Friday, March 19, 2010

Visible Change

Some change you can see right away, a new haircut, the devastation from a storm, a de-cluttered office.

What about glacial change? The kind that definitely has a lasting impact, but is barely perceptible?

After attending a weekend “Warrior Writer” workshop that explains the green beret way to conquer fear and succeed, I think I “get it”: identify your biggest blind spot/weakness and face it.

Picture Louis Gosset Jr. screaming at Richard Gere while RG holds that ab crunching legs out position.
“I want your DOR!”
“I got nowhere else to go.”
Okay that’s a little extreme, but we get the point: Gere has faced his biggest fear: this is the end of the line for him. If he can’t make it, he’s got nowhere else to go.

My biggest weakness and blind spot is self-doubt. I hold myself back. What do I fear? Rejection. Ridicule. I got nowhere else to go!!

How can I tell if I’ve really changed my thought patterns or behavior? I keep writing, and keep sending my chapters to my critique group even if I think they stink. Have I really changed my thinking?
Or is quantifying everything and trying to rank it a sign that I’m still up to my old tricks? Sadly, I won’t know until I can look back and see the effects of my actions.

Here’s my new ‘glass is half-full’ positive roundup of writing-related news:

One of my critique group members signed with an agent! Yahoo!

I devoured The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins and have arranged my weekend to allow time to read the sequel Catching Fire.

I revised my “to do” schedule so that I have daily writing goals, but the weekend is free for reading and watching movies. I have NEVER been a work 24/7 kind of person, so why would I write 24/7? It makes no sense.

Hey, cool - just found this warriorwriters blog...


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Angela Ackerman said...

Self Doubt is a tough thing to overcome. I'm glad you targeted this and are now taking steps to move past it!

Angela @ The Bookshelf Muse