The Fog has Lifted

I'm back BACK the fog has lifted
The earth has shifted
and raised the gifted

name that tune...

I am an official PADI-Certified Open Water Scuba Diver. I spent last Saturday and Sunday refining my skills in the murky depths of some unknown lake by St Zotique Quebec. Apparently divers certifed here have it relatively easy everywhere else because the conditions around here are so bad. I believe it.

I am still having problems clearing my mask. I think I might need to drop some coin on a prescription mask. I can swim with my contacts and goggles, but underwater it takes longer to re-adjust your mask, and keeping my eyes squeezed shut while underwater is just a bit too much - it makes me a little too anxious and my beathing gets ragged. I think if I could keep my eyes open while clearing my mask it might go better. E and I are going to try a few adjustments in a friend's pool soon. I'm also a stinky snorkeler. We're going to work on that this weekend (weather permitting) at the cottage : )

I have a more manageable level of freelance work this week which might actually allow me to - - dare I suggest it? --- work on my book!!! I have an appointment to check in with L this Sunday, so progress must be made or else.

Easily Distracted

My peaceful, quiet home office that I have been SOOO looking forward to using this week has been completely disrupted by project new driveway across the street. The amount of trucks, crew, and construction equipment is almost equal to the water pipe project on the nearby road.

For whatever reason, I am completely fascinated by the process. I keep watching as each piece of equipment or truck does its part. E wants me to go over there with lemonade to try to get them to dump dirt in our driveway. I am too intimidated by the whole operation to even consider it.

Must try to focus... must finish work and send out some invoices... oh yeah, then there's that novel sitting in a binder gathering dust....

Coming up for air

I spent the weekend underwater - literally. I took the 'confined water' aka pool portion of a scuba certification class. The schedule was pretty intense: Friday 6:30 - 11:30 PM, Sat 7:45 AM - 12 noon, 7 PM - 11 PM, then Sunday 4 PM - 11:30 PM.
The time was aboout 1/2 classroom, 1/2 pool.

The first night the pool visibility was bad and I was bordering on panic most of the time even though we stayed in the shallow end on our knees for most of it, so you could see the surface right above you. The panic was completely unfounded - there was nothing wrong, it was just little voices saying 'go up, go up - you don't want to do this' HEY - I recognize those guys - slightly altered versions of the you can't write a book demons. I know better than to listen to them, but they show up at the WORST possible times...

Saturday went MUCH better even though by Saturday night I was coming unglued just from being so tired. I have always been good in a classroom situation and I am not incredibly patient with people who are slower so I was getting really antsy before we got in the pool. In the pool, the tables turned so to speak - I was one of the slowest ones to catch on. It almost always took me at leat two tries to be able to do the skills, and sometimes I needed serious additional explanation. This is normal for me with anything physical - it does not come naturally or easily. I always have to work harder than other people who might not be as book smart or even in as good condition physically. It's just the way it is - I don't like being at the back of the class, but my only other option is to not get to do any of these things.

Sunday I aced the final exam, but was still wrestling with my inability to clear my snorkel and mask. I made it through the pool part, but still need to work on some skills before I feel confident.

There was a 10-yr old kid in my class, and while he struggled a bit in the classroom, he was incredibly at ease in the water. It was impressive and humbling at the same time.

re: sharks. I was more afraid of them before I went to the class than after. Sharks are not aggressive. For the most part they are shy and will swim right by you, which is actually really cool if you think about it. They bite from below, so if you see one that seems interested in you, you can swim away along the bottom and be safe. Driving to the class on the highway under construction in the rain was much more dangerous than diving.

Next weekend we head out to the open water. It's supposed to be easier in many ways than being in the pool, except you need to deal with cold and current. I am looking forward to it because there should at least be something to see besides clumps of hair floating in the pool - yuk.

When E took scuba classes over 20 years ago, you had to take apart and dump your gear on the bottom of the pool, surface, take a breath, swim down and reconnect it all and put it back on underwater. We didn't have to do anything like that. Either the equipment is more reliable, or the odds of ever having to do that are so slim, it just doesn't make sense to freak people out by teaching it.

Today I am really sore and tired, but looking forward to next weekend : )

Overextended

As if doing truckloads of freelance work wasn't enough, I signed up for an intensive scuba certification course this weekend. All scuba, all weekend. AND I get to read the entire scuba book before I get there.

What makes you bouyant? Why does a wetsuit have to be so freaking tight? What's the most important thing to remember so your head doesn't explode? Breathe. Trying to just focus on that one for now.

stop. relax. breathe.

In other news, we had visitors last weekend - my aunts and uncle from Boston. I was of course a maniac. I put rhubarb bars in the oven then sat down on the porch with the door closed, chit-chatting and sipping Sangria until Sgt. Yahoo showed up and said "Hey, Karen - is there supposed to be smoke coming out of the oven?"
They didn't burn - they were ok, in fact pretty freaking tasty. Amazing what 1/2 lb of butter and a few cups of sugar can do to a fibrous weed growing in the yard.

Luckily E handled the rest of the cooking - delicious bbq. We also made it downtown for the last day of the jazzfest and went for a walk along the boardwalk in Ste-Anne. That's the good thing about having people visit - it forces you to re-appreciate your city. We would have completely missed the jazzfest otherwise.

The visit was quick but fun. Now I'm back to work, studying scuba and swimming twice per week.

How is the book going? Hello! Did you read the above? I've completely overscheduled myself and the book is once again on the back burner. I know, I'm an assclown.

I'm #1!

I actually finished 1st in the Women's Duathlon in the Great Race at St. Albans Bay VT last weekend. Not sure if that's a smile or a grimace in the photo. Jumping on your bike after running doesn't feel fantastic, so I'm leaning toward grimace.

See official results here.

If you search triathlon teams/men's kayak over 40 you'll find e. on team sparky - ranked 3rd.

I am the champion.... I am the champion....

Before we all get too excited, let's look at my actual times:
Run 5K 29:49.5
Bike 20K 51:36.0

That's ummmm... slow... but not as slow as sitting on the couch, so there you go.

My reward?


Delicious. And, yes.... I ate the WHOLE THING!

: )

Meeting my Financial Advisor

E: "Why do you look so cranky and worried?"
Me: "I have no idea what I'm doing with invoicing/taxes, etc. and it's freaking me out."
E: "I know a good financial planner you can talk to"
Me: "I don't have any money - he won't want to talk to me."
E:"Yes, he will - that's what he does"

I always thought financial planners were for people who had millions of dollars to put 'somewhere' but just weren't sure where. This guy was a strategist - tell him where you are, what you're doing, where you want to be and he'll help you come up with a plan to get there.

Me: "I'm broke and working all the time and not getting my book done. I'd like to be not broke, not working all the time, finished with my first book and working on the second."

I have 3 initial things to do:
a) schedule my time and stick to the schedule. no more agreeing to last-minute rush jobs that require me to write all day. ridiculous.
b) clean my office. It's causing me undue stress.
c) network.

Parts a and b yes, I probably could have figured out for myself. It was part c that I was thinking of in the wrong way. I still need to mull over this networking stuff, but it's starting to make more sense.

So here I am, cleaning my office. Or blogging...

Technical Difficulties

The BIGGEST Word doc that I've been working on is now un-openable. I don't know why. I have several copies, backup versions, versions sent as e-mail attachments,etc. etc. The only one I can still open is so old it will require re-doing A LOT of work. damn damn damn. I guess that's how the writing projects crumble. It's part of a freelance job, not my book. grrr.

I should have posted earlier because I WAS doing much better - head clear, getting stuff done. grrr.

mood: cranky
listening to: myself complain

Brain Fog

Current location: Ile-Perrot. Status: permanent : )

I am sooo f-ing tired...

Cause?
1. driving from Plainfield to Ile-Perrot and having a flat tire and flat spare en route
2. working full days as soon as I got here
3. going away for the weekend- fun, but nothing on the 'to-do' list got done - see 5.
4. adjusting to new surroundings
5. not being unpacked
6. going to a bye-bye barbecue for another friend who left as soon as I arrived
7. more work to do, deadline quickly approaching
8. zero book progress
9. 99% humidity
10. less than fantastic nutrition the last week
11. leaving my sister and her family
12. seeing my ex-college roommates, having a great time, and having to accept that we might not see each other again unless we magically manage to keep in touch
13. pms

Poor E. I might barricade myself in my office with a book until my black cloud passes.

Reprieve

I got a 2-week deadline extension on my current project - yay! I'm still work-work-working on it, but now it' s more of a midterm in a big class kind of stress instead of an omigod I have to study for all the finals for all the classes I didn't got to all year kind of panic.

I love this: go here, then scroll way down to the bottom right to see the stick figure at a computer.

My world

I feel like I am always on the move, but I apparently just keep going to the same places over and over. The map of countries I've visited is pretty limited:


create your own visited country map
or check our Venice travel guide

Thanks to Stephen for the link. (tried to link to his Mac account - got an erorr page - no more Stephen on the net?)

I think it's kind of funny that I've been to opposite ends of the earth.
No in-between for me.

Next on my list:
Cuba - this year? All talk so far, waiting for action.
Europe - hopefully Italy for a nice cycling trip
Africa - the leisurely tourist stroll up Kilimanjaro - hopefully by the time I'm 50

All these fancy trips require moola so for now my world is the size of my desk where I am busy writing.

She Works Hard for Her Money

The sun is shining, the kids are outside splashing in the wading pool and I'm at my desk working. Yes, the glamorous life of freelancers isn't all hakuna matada.

I have a ton, yes TON of work to finish by the 15th, not to mention that I need time to shop for an outfit that makes me look glamorous for my reunion with my college rommates on the 16th.

So I am either working, working out or webcam skyping the infamous e because I miss him so much. If you have any long-distance friends and family you must MUST go to skype.com, download it and use it to talk, and then hook up a web cam so you can see each other. It's the best. E told me to get a web cam months ago. Talking and seeing each other makes a HUGE difference. Why don't I listen?

Back to the grind.. my boss is a task master, and she wants me to get back to the firggin' book!

Yes, yes, I'm leaving soon

But I just HAD to check Evil Eidtor. Come on - are you reading it? He's hilarious. From today's blog:

<<...the only credits that might have an effect are, My previous book sold 100,000 copies, or My article, "How to Murder People Who Disappoint You, and Get Away With It," appeared in last month's Soldier of Fortune.>>

Good stuff. OK. leaving now. well, soon. one more sip of coffee. still need to pack up toiletries. ETD 8AM.

Evil Editor takes on a Quebec Separatist Plot

I am addicted to Evil Editor. He makes fun of people's query letters for their novels and then posts a revised version. Maybe you have to be in the process to appreciate it, but I think he's hilarious. His blog today includes a query for a book about Canadian civil war.

Why do I have so much free time to browse the Internet at my leisure?
a) because I've finished all my freelance work
b) because my book is done
c) because my world will stop spinning without Miss Snark and Evil Editor
d) because I'm supposed to be packing and I'm avoiding it

Those of you familiar with our main character Karen know that the answer is d, although c is also acceptable.

Packing. Again. This story is getting old - I know.

This time I'll be in Plainfield for 3 weeks, then it's back to Parrot Island officially. It isn't easy leaving E this time and it's going to be incredibly difficult to leave the 'trattons. I can't think about it, not sure how I'm going to do it.

For now, procrastination....

Scam Agents

As if it's not hard enough to write a book, then you have to be careful not to end up with someone listed on the Writers Beware 20 Worst Agencies List like Barbara Bauer who managed to cause the Absolute Write Site to be shut down.

Doing lots of freelance work, little book work, but money is coming in. The last thing I need to worry about is scam agents. grrrrr. Bad, bad people.

No, I have not abandoned the book writing 'thing'

However, I am broke and I do need to earn some money doing freelance corporate writing right now. I have work lined up solidly through the end of August, and I'm incredibly, ridiculously busy from now until June 30 with a big contract. Freelancing is supposed to be feast or famine so right now I'm feasting. I blocked off most of September for vacation - 1 week with E and 2 weeks to drive to OH and then IL for the Midwest Lit Fest.

My original plan was to take a year off to write a book and I did that. The book isn't quite ready to be sent out but it is in good enough condition that I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Did I plan on the whole E/move back to Mtl thing? No. Do I feel incredibly lucky about the whole E situation? Yes : ) Once I figure out how to balance freelance feast/famine with bookwriting progress I will be 100% on track career-wise. As for personal-life wise, I'm happy, sooo happy : ) : )

The only (BIG) downside is living so far from the Strattons again. That's why I'm blocking time off for long visits. Lack of family-visit vacation time was one of my major complaints when I was a 9-5'er, so if I don't solve that problem when I'm my own boss, then I'm really not ahead of the game, am I?

It's a holiday in Canada: Victoria Day, but my boss says I have so much work to get done between now and June 30 that I better do some of it today. There will be nicer days to take off later.

: )

Internet for Hire?

If I'm understanding the situation correctly, there's a possibility that corporations will be able to pay to have some sort of control over how we find sites on the Internet. I'm not sure I understand how it's possible, but it sounds bad. Go here to get the scoop and sign the petititon. Moveon.org is in line with my political views so I tend to trust them.

Helping E Appreciate the Fine Art of Slacking

Spent the weekend at E's cottage 'up north'. We already live further north than any of my friends or family, but we went further 'up north' to relax. Thanks to the rain and bugs there was nothing to do but lounge around reading and watching movies.

I was concerned about E's ability to take advantage of the slacker opportunity when he put rain boots on Saturday morning to go retrieve his dock that had floated away. He redeemed himself by sleeping all afternoon and helping me make dinner by telling me to 'put on my boots, go outside under the deck and turn on the tank' in order to use the gas stove. I did it even though a true slacker would have just made popcorn instead of cooking a meal. My thai beef pasta was delicious, BTW.

Apart from an unfortunate hornet sting incident, the weekend was perfect. I did some work on my book, read a few chapters in Villette and de-stressed.

On a side note: if Wolverine were bitten by a hornet do you think he would complain? I'm pretty sure he WOULD because it really freakin' hurts.

Another side note: got my new monitor and printer set up. Nice.

Fun While it Lasted

I now have more freelance work than I know what to do with. I'm sitting in a bicycling outfit waiting for my turn on e's road bike, trying to muster the enegy to walk to the dep (Montrealspeak for convenience store) to buy milk, avoiding the extra work I need to do tonight, also avoiding the additional LCD monitor research I have to do and not-so-secretly wishing I could just curl up with Villette.

The book? My book? Zero progress. None. Nada. All blame belongs to me. I suck at balancing more than one thing at a time. I never could juggle. I'm so tired and cranky that I shouldn't have too many friends or people wanting to work with me for much longer so my free time might open up again.

Off to get milk because we know that having no milk for my morning coffee gets extremely ugly.

definitely bookless....

Energy levels

I do not consider myself to be a lazy person. I work, I work out, I take the stairs instead of the elevator. I almost never laze in front of the television. In general, I usually feel like I accomplish a decent amount every day.

That being said, I cannot keep up with e. In the time it took me to make coffee and read Evil Editor, he installed an FM transmittor on the laptop in the kitchen so we can play music on speakers in the living room and the porch, and then he carried in the pieces (IKEA) of the second book shelf for my office. As he lugged the pieces up the stairs, I was sitting in my office sipping coffee.

I am not done with my 'downtime' but I feel a little guilty while he runs around work-work-working. He's even humming a happy tune. This is completely foreign behavior to me. He claims he isn't annoyed by my need for a little more 'downtime' but I am suspicious, happy tune notwithstanding.

Ok, I have to at least go clear space for this book shelf. My coffee will definitely get cold in the process. Must find a balance here....

Going for the Green

I've had to spend the last couple of days chasing down freelance work. boooo. That means little to no book writing is getting done. I have some time this morning, but unfortunately I have to prepare a quote and see if I packed more than one pair of presentable pants. Hopefully after this afternoon, this project will be able to be done off-site.

I'm wasting all my post-conference motivation. :(

On the plus side, it looks like some green will be coming my way so at least I can afford a faster printer and some ink. :)